The Understory

How We Even Got Here If you had told me that one day I’d be connecting a sci-fi movie about aliens to my wife’s therapy stories and a man’s beef with two dogs, I would’ve assumed I was in the middle of a very weird dream—

The Conversation That Changed Me I recently had a conversation with someone about Pride Month—nothing deep — just one of those casual hallway exchanges that turns into a mirror. I asked a few questions. Not offensive, not hostile — but clumsy. Embarrassing. The kind of questions that come out sideways when

Shedding the Layers of Performance, Pressure, and Spiritual Inheritance. This series was born not from outrage, but from reflection—deep, painful, and personal. In therapy, I’ve had to peel back layers of my own story to face how shame, pride, and anxiety were shaped early on—not just by

The cost of being first should not be your emotional freedom A couple of weeks ago, I was sitting at my daughter’s gymnastics practice.I’m typically the parent who drops her off — my wife is a therapist and often sees patients well into the evening. I’m fortunate

“You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. You just might be out of sync with your own values, choices, or capacity.” The Illusion of Everlasting Drive We live in a world that worships effort. The teacher who never clocks out. The nonprofit leader who sacrifices rest for the mission.

Imagine a stage play where the lead actor never leaves their character. Even after the curtain closes, they continue the performance—backstage, in the hallway, in the parking lot. The audience has gone home, but the actor remains in costume, repeating lines, staying in posture, afraid that stepping out of

Lately, I’ve been sitting with the weight of my own work. Between managing a nonprofit board, podcasting about my family history and culture, and researching for an upcoming book, I’ve found myself circling back to a familiar theme: motivation. Not the motivational posters kind—but the kind that